EggNOT: The Gift That Needs to Stop Giving
What is the most horrifying thing you can think of? Zombies? Aliens? The world exploding? No matter what you came up with, let me propose to you something even worse: eggnog. This ‘’holiday drink’’ is the bane of my existence from November to January. Now, I don’t know how many interactions you as a reader have had with this liquid death, but let me tell you some of mine. Now of course, every survivor of this drink can remember the first time they ingested it. The horrors that came with it. The absolute madness it caused. As a child, I was expecting something good. It looked to me like a cinnamon hot chocolate, but as it entered my mouth, I realized the mistake I had made. This liquid that tasted like a literal egg yolk running down my throat. I tried to spit out as much as I could, but to no avail; it had already gone down my throat.
Many years later, I tried again, thinking that perhaps a peppermint eggnog would actually be delicious. I thought wrong. I not only had a thick, eggy substance running down my throat, but it now included a hint of mint that stuck with me for hours. To all the people out there who thoroughly enjoy eggnog, and eggnog-flavored ice cream, waffles, or anything of the sort, I just have one question: why? Why do you love something that proves time and time again to be a disappointment? Why do you continue to egg the eggnog industry on to make its disgusting product year after year? The only reason that eggnog is still popular today is because it has become a ‘’tradition’’ for many people. If you ask me, this is one tradition that needs to stay in the past.